Sunday, November 28, 2010

11/28/10: Nothing new on the Free Bench...

...though some things did come and go, a plastic juice pitcher, several unopened filters for Brita water pitchers, a couple reusable Whole Foods bags.

I have been thinking about the idea of aging also being fading.  It's not an original idea, but I find myself wanting to think of it symbolically.  If we do indeed fade as we age, what might the purpose for this be?  Does fading suggest an inner process that is vital and appropriate?  I have a sense of relief about the idea of some youthful things fading.  I am grateful that my feelings are less epic than they used to be, for example, that the intensity of them has faded.  I still have big feelings, but not so much on the order of several different ones daily.
   
Also, the concept of fading implies a see-er, someone who takes note of one having been more distinct or vibrant-looking previously (the see-er can even be oneself looking in a mirror).  Does fading, then, imply an appropriate turning more inward: I am no longer projecting my vitality outward as much, I am keeping more of the energy of it for myself?  Our popular culture tells us that much of life is about being seen.  So how do we make peace with this fading when our culture suggests that it is literally our worthiness of attention fading away? 

How do we continue toward being our own inner seer, validating the rightness of making less of a stir out there and more of one in here?

Hmm.  I started thinking about all the people I know who are older than I, in their 50's, 60's, 70's, and they haven't faded at all.  Maybe it's all a ploy to sell make-up and hair dye...

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